Times they are a changin' and I’m scared

I write this on the heels of what to date is the most surreal week of my life. Likely many of our lives, at least my generation.

At thirty five this is the craziest shit I have seen yet and I fear the chaos is just getting started... After weeks of coronavirus threatening our country and taking its toll elsewhere in the world, it’s now sinking its teeth deeper into our society and we are soooo not ready for it.  

Just last week Gavin and I were making our way across the country, enjoying the sights and sounds of America the beautiful along an epic road trip. While visiting friends in Louisiana I suffered my first panic attack, ironically after attempting to calm my mind with yoga (it clearly failed). I worked myself up just thinking about the havoc that the virus could potentially ensue on my life, my family and the daily life of our communities.

Never have I ever realized the immense power of my own thoughts and the vulnerability I have to them (mental health is real!) And that was when everything was still business as usual. We were still going to stores, restaurants, and sporting events relatively unfazed by it all. Some cases had popped up, and a nursing home in Washington State was seeing the brunt of it, along with a stricken cruise ship (never shall I set foot on one of those, mark my words). We were seeing the effects of it abroad but it hadn’t started to infiltrate our daily lives yet. And that already feels like a lifetime ago.

Fast forward one week and I’m in Atlanta, having continued on our road trip, though the elements of “vacation” are dissipating. Atlanta was once our home, and is full of dozens of new places I’ve wanted to explore and many old friends I’ve wanted to catch up with. But for now we will keep a tight circle among our family and a couple closest friends, minimizing our contact with the outside world and maintaining “social distance” a term that meant nothing to use only a couple short weeks ago.. 

I’ll be posting regular updates as best I can here, in efforts to keep a record of my own experiences and those of others living through these unprecedented times.

This Week’s Silver Lining: Given the uncertainty of the virus and the possibility of community spread we decided to hunker down in Atlanta which gives us at least another week of quality time with our niece and nephew. Typically we only get to visit with them once a year, and we love them dearly, so we are appreciating the gift of additional time with them, plus they’re presence has been so up-lifting.

Today’s Headlines: Feds drop interest rate as part of emergency action plan, My home state of Massachusetts closes schools for three weeks, restricts restaurants to take out only and bans gatherings of 25 or more

Best Thing I Saw: Blooming tulips and daffodils while walking through Atlanta’s Grant Park. I was also on the phone with my BFF Nora which made it extra special. Another silver lining is having more time to have some good old fashioned phone calls with my friends.

Best Thing I Read: The uplifting stories of Italians breaking out in song together and playing music for one another amidst the country’s lockdown.

Best Thing I Watched: Invincible with Mark Wahlburg, when he makes it on the Philadelphia Eagles after an open call in the 70s. I crave feel good content now, especially before bed…

Best Thing I Ate: Corned Beef and Cabbage dinner courtesy of our friend Sean, including some amazing Irish Soda Bread (I didn’t even know that could be a thing).

How I tried to Spread Joy: Gifted Sean’s three year old daughter a mannequin head of Elsa for her birthday. As a hairdresser I’m very familiar with mannequin heads. It turns up kids aren’t as comfortable with body-less dolls… but it grew on her.